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The Palin Obsession

November 12, 2008

So, the noises are getting louder that Sarah Palin might run for US Prez in 2012.

OMFG. I need to unload.

You think you’d know a country after you’ve lived in it for so long. Don’t get me wrong. My conservative friends in the Bay Area are a warm, wonderful, intelligent bunch but I find myself asking what is it that makes 74% of Republicans think Palin is remotely qualified to be president? I mean seriously, what is wrong with you guys?

During the campaign, we’ve all heard the reasons why Palin was supposedly “the best VP candidate in the history of the country.”

a. She has a special needs child (her youngest child Trig has Down’s Syndrome).
Implication: She has a special needs child, that’s why she’s the best person to lead America.

b. She can see Russia from her house.
Implication: It makes her an expert on foreign policy. Hell, even George Bush can’t see Russia from his house. That’s why she’s the best person to lead America.

c. She has been working on pipelines in Alaska.
Implication: It makes her an expert on energy policy. That’s why she’s the best person to lead America.

d. She is against abortion.
Implication: It makes her a good moral guardian of traditional Christian American values. That’s why she’s the best person to lead America.

e. She has Hank Williams Jr, the fat guy with sunglasses, cowboy hat and scruffy beard, as a stage prop at her rallies.
Implication: She must be a real American ‘cuz Hank, he don’t hang out with fake Americans. She’s one of us. That’s why she’s the best person to lead America.

f. That Obama, he’s… he’s a terrorist socialist. He wants to take our money and kill us.
Implication: It makes her the unterrorist unsocialist, the good guy. That’s why she’s the best person to lead America.

g. Troopergate, the $150,000 shopping spree, the wanton spending on taxpayer’s money on herself, the fruit fly flap, the call from ‘President Sarkozy,’ the too-little too-late medical report. Those are just made-up issues.
Implication: She’s a victim of sexism and the press is mean to her. That’s why she’s the best person to lead America.

Now that it’s over and she has decided that all that attention was rather enthralling, she has announced she’s not ruling out a White House bid in 2012. And 74% of Republicans have rallied behind her to say YES, we want Sarah! *Bangs head on the keyboard.*

Here’s another fact. 46% or 58 million American voters during the 2008 election believe she’s the one we should trust if McCain croaks. That’s nearly 1 in every 2 Americans who think its cool to have a pretty airhead run the country. 1 in every 2! Who cares if she doesn’t know if Africa is a country or a continent. This election is about America, not Africa.

Ok, its a democracy. Anyone can run for office. What surprises me to no end is why every other American thinks Sarah the Clueless, with that kind of a record, has anything in her to sail the supertanker called America thru treacherous straits without running it aground. Seriously, is it something in the water?

You know wat I think? I think the answer is a lot simpler than we think. I think male Palinites voted her for one reason and one reason only. Because she’s HOT. SHE.IS.HOT. There I said it. In bold italics. Twice. If Palin was a fat, sagging woman I’ll bet any amount of money she wouldn’t have gotten that 74%. That, I truly think, is the bottom line. As long as she’s hot to look at, she’ll bag Mr. Conservative’s votes. All that other stuff don’t matter ‘cuz Obama is a mean socialist terrorist (oh, they upgraded him to Marxist terrorist recently, didya know).

And the Palinite ladies? Half of them I suspect are Hillary supporters who are still mad that she lost in the Dem primaries. The other half are probably mothers like her who think she fits better in a Norman Rockwell depiction of America than the other guy with the funny name. We get it. Its the identity, stupid. Who cares about the economy.

I have nothing against women politicians. Put up Palin, Hillary and Geraldine Ferraro for a vote and I’ll tell you who I’ll pick. Hillary. Not because she’s a woman but because I think the senator from New York has earned her stripes. And she knows Washington like the back of her hand. But Palin? Puhlease.

Still. I do think Palin should run for Leader of the GOP because clearly the Republican party has not learnt its lesson. (Sorry Romney and Huckabee, she’s got nicer legs than you. And cluelessness is the new black.) As for 2012, as Bush would say, bring it on. A Palin ticket will assure the Dems an even wider majority than 2008. So I say hell yeah, Palin for 2012!

End of rant. Over and out.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Dee permalink
    November 13, 2008 10:56 am

    Whoa! So much anger. tee hee. I must say I agree with you on this post of yours. I was appalled by her interview with the press after she did her ballots in Alaska. wtf.

    Actually I’m not angry. 🙂 Just utterly perplexed. To imagine that half of America are wingnuts… that’s just not the America I know.

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