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How far will you go…

February 18, 2009

A movie on cable last night triggered off a memory about my friend in Sg whom I blogged about before – the one whose father was so deep in debt that it could devastate his family, including his own future.

It got me thinking, how far should one go to rescue a loved one? A parent, spouse, sibling or child who got into a situation out of their own foolishness. Perhaps they gambled everything or trusted their life savings to a cheat. In the aftermath, the only way they’ll survive is if you rescue them.

Everyone makes mistakes, we like to say.

Ever heard of the riddle, if you and your mother were on a boat that was rapidly sinking, who would you save? Yourself or your mother?

In these times, some of us will face this question.

Will we be prepared for it if it comes?

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. LC Teh permalink
    February 18, 2009 3:55 pm

    Right. DIYDx2 (Damned if you do, damned if you don’t)

    If the verdict is clear, I’ll try to save the one who got conned. One who gambles brings it on himself.

    I agree, only that I see gambling differently. If you put money into something that a) has no guarantee, b) you do not understand such as complex derivatives, and c) you have no control over the chances of winning except pray to the money god, then you are gambling. I’m already hearing about people losing their life savings after being influenced by friends into “gambling” in this manner. They aren’t exactly conned. They just got greedy. It is a sorry sight.

  2. stella permalink
    February 19, 2009 12:28 am

    So how’s your father’s friend settle the debt after some times ? Did u do something? It looks like a personal matter & I shouldn’t nose to this business. It’s alright for me if u don’t want to tell.
    There are people that people has help, but still repeat the mistake of accumulating the debts, do not try to save & keep spending.. It’s very frustrating & stressful. People should know that they have to be responsible with their own actions. No matter what we do, we cannot run away from the retribution. I think just let nature take it cause.

    As for the riddle, me & my mother do not know how to swim, so both us will die once the boat is sinking unless there is a miracle. haha!

    Anyway I think u know the answer.

    My friend’s situation hasn’t changed unfortunately. They’re still living day to day and one thing I have to say, if one is in financial difficulty, its better to be in Malaysia than Singapore.

    Yeah some people seem to be stuck on doing the same thing over and over again. They don’t know anyting else. I guess without such people around, we’ll have no opportunity to learn patience and compassion.

  3. LC Teh permalink
    February 19, 2009 9:22 am

    To me, ‘conned’ means you got some money, property, etc and a friend comes along with a long sad story of endless misery asks you for help, and you, out of the goodness of your heart takes it upon yourself to sacrifice your life-time savings as well as throw in your property to try to save him/her, thus losing everything, including that so-called friend, because he/she disappeared after taking everything you gave him/her.

    So far (touch wood) I haven’t met this poor selfless sod yet. So it looks like a good chance I’m not going into this kind of charity myself…

    I go along with your take on gambling.

    Ah… never say never. Thanks to the scams perpetuated by people like Madoff and more recently, Stanford, we will be seeing more suicides as people realize their entire life savings have gone up in smoke.

  4. LC Teh permalink
    February 20, 2009 11:53 am

    Sometimes people see the same warnings everyday in front of their faces but fail to heed it. I suppose people read the ‘In God we trust’ on the US dollar bill as ‘In (this) God we trust’.

    Somehow I even have had that distrust of ‘trust’ funds too. I just leave what meager savings I have in the banks and pray these banks and the govt (who promised they’re guaranteed) don’t crash out. Well, if they do, then ‘que sera sera’. How safe is safe anyway? And this life not guaranteed either.

    Yup, no guarantees in life except those 2 things we’re told. But I also hear that with cryogenics and a Swiss bank account, you can negotiate death and taxes. 🙂

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