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My favorite stupid and most predictable movie scenes

July 17, 2009

1. Someone flees on foot from a chasing car. Instead of doing evasive maneuvers like dodging between lamp posts and jumping over fences, he always runs down the middle of an empty street or alley. Must ensure your attackers have plenty of space to squish you.

2. Its late at night. Someone bangs on the front door. The occupant shouts “Who is it?” but the knocker never responds. The occupant is always dumb enough to open the door.

3. A guy tiptoes quietly through the house to evade an intruder. Someone, usually a friend or family member, will suddenly grab him out of nowhere. Amazingly, the pouncer never gets kicked in the nuts which is what people usually do when they get startled in a life threatening situation.

4. A villain, facing a gun pointed at him by a crying woman, says, “Go ahead, shoot. You don’t have the guts.” And true enough, the woman will drop the gun and collapse in a sobbing heap. Bad guy takes gun and promptly wastes her.

5. A husband, typing at home on his computer, suddenly hears his wife scream for help upstairs. Does he immediately drop everything and dash upstairs? Nooo… he pauses 3 seconds, shouts “Honey?” a couple of times, pauses another 3 seconds, makes a face, shouts “Honey are you okay?” one more time, and then walks calmly upstairs. He has to ensure the murderer gets plenty of time to make mincemeat of his wife and be on his way to the next state.

6. Someone spots the bad guys coming up the road and yells, “They’re coming!” His friends give him an incredulous look and go, “Whaddya mean they’re coming?” comfirming what I’ve suspected all along. That many English-speaking Hollywood actors don’t actually understand English.

7. Its spring break and a big party’s goin’ on at the beach. Look, there’s not a single fat or ugly chick is in sight! In real life, half the chicks that come to your all-American party are out of shape.

And….

8. You occasionally see scenes of guys going to the washroom, talking to each other at the urinals, even sitting on the potty. Women, why they never go to the toilet. And if they do, its only to do one thing – put on makeup or adjust their hair. 😀

Got any more to add?

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. July 17, 2009 3:48 pm

    standard comedy movie formula

    1.guy turns out to be a loser , or an average joe
    2.guy found something , his life gets better , and guy meets a chick
    3.guy made a mistake , he screw up his life , chick left him
    4.make up at the airport with chick , or give the “you gotta do what you wanna do” speech to public , and public applause . bad guy in shame .
    5.happy ending , guy gets the girl

  2. July 17, 2009 8:59 pm

    Very common Chinese movie. A daughter of a top under world gangster get attracted and fall in love with the hero suppose to be hired to trace the gangster. The hero has all the information through pretending to be friend the gangster’s daughter. Finally almost at the end her dad was killed by the hero. She cried terribly and the hero said “I am sorry” and leave the scene And the girl lives a lovelorn life thereafter.

  3. July 18, 2009 10:09 pm

    hero always powerless but is destined to save the world (using luck?). then the bad guy will kick him around like a rag doll and then he dies…or close to that…only to be revived by some miraculous events and goes on to beat the bad guy like he’s nothing. 😐

    This kind of stuff exists in cartoons n kiddish films…and now has been practiced in hollywood too.

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